**sigh**

This post is an unusual one. It's about my work. I am posting it because no one I work with (I think...) looks at my blog. And if they do, owell. I'm beyond caring anymore. I am struggling with my job, more the women I work with. I have always struggled working there, but get paid well for what I do and I actually like what I do -- it's the people I have a hard time with. We work in a small office of 8 women, and you know how they can be at times...caddy and down right mean.

I have cut down to 1 day a week and honestly since I moved back from Vegas have felt like I am just not really liked. Shunned, in a sense. I have really felt this way recently since some of the office dynamic has changed. At first this didn't bother me, I was glad to be out of the drama and not a part of their 'clique'. But now for some reason it bothers me. Not that I want to be a part of the drama or in a 'clique', what is this? High School? I just don't want to go into work feeling like I am not liked, it makes for a very uncomfortable 8 hours. It's not this way all the time, either. Some days they are great people, we laugh and I don't always feel totally 'shunned' - and then....

Today was the first time it bothered me to tears over something so silly. I think I've just had it. I called Bert to vent my frustration saying I just want to quit - that I don't make enough to really notice if we didn't have it and I just want to be a mom at home with my baby enjoying all the positive energy I can surround myself with. ...he of course, said no. Then later said I could. I know he's kidding. That won't happen until I can find something else to take place of the extra income my pitiful 8 hour a week job brings in.

So for now, I **sigh** and continue to go in with a smile on my face and positive energy within me. I have to remember some women are just unhappy no matter what and I can't let them bring me down. Misery likes company, right? Well, that's not the sort of company I wish to surround myself with. I'll keep my mouth shut and my eyes forward.